The perfect picture

She sighed and wiped the tear off her cheek. Picked the baby up and asked her furry mutt baby to follow and walked with her shoulders squared.

Her four-legged baby kept eying her while walking in. Her god child kept her tiny hands on her cheek. She smiled and said “I love you too”

She looked around to look for the owners of the farm to tell them the good news. They had crossed their target of funds to raise by a phenomenal amount. She put the piece of paper with the amount of 1,39,45,678₹ in his hand with a twinkle and a mischievous smile in his hand. He looked at her puzzled and read the paper and his jaw dropped. He screamed an expletive and hugged her. Her mutt baby immediately barked as she knew her mother didn’t like tight long hugs, but he was really happy and she was uncomfortable but didn’t react. The baby wriggled and he let go. Joy and pride and fulfilment oozed out of his every pore. Words weren’t needed .

His wife walked in wondering what the commotion was all about I signalled him to keep it quite so the guest wouldn’t stop funding anymore. She was from a NGO she knew the money would be needed for one thing or another.

His wife and he hugged and kissed. She looked away. Remorseful. A tear slide down her cheek and she just hugged her god child close hummed a bit of ‘ in love with the shape of you’ sat down put her face on her dogs face and signed deep again. She let a couple of tears run amok before she squared her shoulders again. The couple looked at her confused. She smiled and said “happy tears”. Wondering if she had gotten better at lying or the only person who would catch a lie was the one she was missing the most. She could see his face questioning tilted to one side with an eyebrow raised. She should feel a smile on her face at that picture.

She looked up wondering why she had to lie. She should be happy. She just raised a phenomenal amount to help build a cattery, a free flight aviary and a beautiful barn, but most importantly her dream school for two and four-legged children. She should feel happy, proud that she could still achieve dreams. But the more she thought more the memory turned blue. She knew what she missed, she knew all she wanted was a hug from a loved person, his tiny smile that would reach the corner of his eyes. All she wanted was for him to be beside her. He wasn’t far he was a couple of tables away sitting with his colleagues.

She didn’t look that way. She just walked right up to her god daughter’s mom. Put the baby in her lap with a smile and walked right to the bar. Had a glass of wine just a sip and put in back.

Marched to the nearby table to make conversation and focus on being the host for the lovely fundraiser and see if she could damage their pockets more.

perfect picture

A perfect picture

A patch of shade
Under a lush green tree
Playing with fur and
A chuckling toddler
A perfect picture

That makes me sad
Cause not the kid
Nor the furry dog
Not the shade
Nor the tree
Not the love
Nor the smiles
Belong to me.

Upset
A tear sneaks away
Sad
The lonely heart aches
As love not found
For a long time
Reeks of self-doubt
And shame

I want the dream
I want my patch of shade
Under a tree of love
I need a home
where I am loved

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